Think of those days when you felt that things were different.
Those periods when you pondered the ‘what if….?’ Chewing over those missed opportunities, and the lack of initiative that was on show during those key occasions.
Don’t worry, you are not the only one. Often this state of mind comes down to your past failings. Your inability to get what you want, even when the moment presented itself and you had a chance to make it right.
The question is: why didn’t it happen?
What stopped you from taking the necessary steps that could have helped you get what you want, or at least taken you closer to achieving it?
There are a lot of ways to diagnose a person’s history. Particularly an unfavorable one.
And there are a lot of ways to analyze a past scenario, to determine the ways in which things could have gone (i.e. worked out differently or better).
But in each of these instances, there is one factor that stands out. One central feature in the equation falls within the cause and effect structure of human decision-making. And that factor is your mindset.
If today you think that your life could have been a different story? If you believe that things could have been different and most of all if you think you deserve better than what life has handed out to you? Well, then this post maybe has some answers for you.
What Divides the Winners from the Losers
Think of the guy who has it all.
We all know that person. Or at least some version of him. He could be someone in your life. Or he could be someone famous.
A celebrity or a public personality. Essentially he (or she) is someone who has the very things that you want. Or sadly for some, once wanted but no longer.
So why does he have all the success? What makes him so different? What has made this guy (or character) the source of your fascination or (somewhat justified) envy?
Well, I wish I can say that there is a simple answer to these questions. But there is an answer. More than one actually.
The most obvious, and one could say seemingly simple ones are:
The Luck of the draw (Silver Spoon).
Knowing the Right people at the right time (Also Luck).
Amazing Skill and Talent.
Sheer Determination Mixed with Skill and Talent.
Divine Gift (For those Religious)
Let’s just say that all of the above have some part to play in the equation of success. Some more than others. But critically for our endeavor, and for your advancement reader, certain of these factors matter more than others.
So let’s look at some of them in detail, before we get to the most important one for you. However, if you are not willing to wait around here is a quick summary point:
Some people in life do have it easy. For some people, things do JUST happen. At least they seem to. For even then it is just half the story (as we shall explain). However, these ‘lucky’ ones are few and far between. Too few in fact. And even for those whose things do go their way, there is a lot of work that needs to be done.
Getting Lucky (Forget it)
Well, this point ought to be obvious.
The idea of achieving success in life via the luck of the draw (quite literally or otherwise) is a bad strategy for anyone.
Often the idea of someone getting the right side of the coin in a significant way is often viewed from the standpoint of birth or heritage and by extension the kind of social networks the person in question has access to.
This sort of thing is most notable in the world of politics and to some extent in acting.
One of the features (or evils) of modern politics, particularly in the developing world is the practice of family members succeeding ruling politicians. Which at its worst takes the form of institutionalized nepotism.
In the world of theatrical arts, we see this pattern. Especially if the artist in question is a success.
Essentially the idea of getting lucky comes down to factors that have basically been handed down to the person who can use it as a platform to launch his/her career.
Though it is important to keep in mind the silent hurdle: that having everything handed down to you may mean the beneficiary can take things too easy. And guess what? They often do (Think here of the spoilt kids of politicians and rich celebrities).
The point is the idea of success is something that corresponds to excelling at something important. Something that produces or adds value to society.
And just having the luck of the draw in terms of money, networks, and opportunity alone is not going to cut it.
If it is any consolation a lot of those kids with rich or famous parents, who tend to have everything handed to them, tend not to do too well. Think about it.
And why should they?!
If everything you wanted in life (well almost everything) is just given to you on a silver platter, then what is the point of working for it?!
Or more seriously, what is going to be that compelling force that is going to drive you to go forward and do great things?
Success is often born in the face of hardship. Hardship and adversity are key factors that motivate people (men especially) to get tough and take action.
Amazing Skill and Talent (There’s Something Here)
Let’s face it: Some people are just better than others.
As there is no question that some people are born (or blessed) with great talent. Skills or talents that give them a noticeable edge when it comes to a specific field: Whether it is in sports, the arts, or in academics elsewhere.
Whilst the talent theory of success has a lot of merits (I mean who can deny the genius of someone like Claude Shannon).
However, the point remains that without dedication, application, and the will to persist in the face of adversity and monotony, one that any true success story will attest to, all that natural, innate talent and intelligence is not going to count for much.
This is a point that is particularly true in the world of academics.
As the famous Dr. Otto Octavius said to Peter Parker in Spiderman 2 (before he became the supervillain Dr. Octopus): Intelligence is not a privilege, it's a gift. And you use it for the good of mankind.
Divine Gift or Blessing
OK. So this is a touchy area (depending on the reader) and one must tread carefully.
First off, there is little that we can say for or against this point. The fact is a lot of people have beliefs in a higher or greater power. One whose ways are not fully known.
The belief is that this higher power can bestow special graces of gifts, which can be tangible or otherwise; those that can positively affect the well-being and mindset of the person who believes (or asks) for them.
And maybe that is true.
And for those who believe in such things we are not here to question them. And for those who don’t, that’s fine as well.
However when it comes to success in life the question of what you believe in does matter!
Belief is a powerful thing. And the belief in a higher power or as we like to see it, the belief in a higher purpose, is a key driving force in the life of a person. One that directly corresponds to the question of success.
And this is a serious point. As there is no shortage of views and philosophies that promote the idea of meaninglessness and narrow self-service. Or the worldview that human life, and by extension the progress of human history is fiction. Where everything is ultimately meaningless.
The popular (or not) public intellectual Yuval Noah Harari Sapiens in his best-selling book observed: ‘How do you cause people to believe in an imagined order such as Christianity, democracy or capitalism? First, you never admit that the order is imagined'.
Needless to say, our view of reality is not as nihilistic or as simple.
And fellas, in case any of you were wondering that the philosophy life that corresponds to success is somehow limited to those that reject God, religion, philosophy, or more critically the belief in a greater good, then this is a reality check.
Beliefs do matter. Philosophies like Stoicism and other systems of thought do matter.
Whilst the great questions about origins and life are still unknown, the belief in a higher cause or purpose is a powerful driver for success in life. Which exists independently of whether you believe in divine blessing or not.
The Right Way: Sheer Determination Aided by Talent and Skill
OK. So now we are getting there.
First of all, there is no single formula for success in life. The pathway to success can take multiple routes; as many as there are career options a person can pursue.
Whilst the focus in Western culture tends to revolve around the rich and the famous: which usually concerns the lives of actors, sports stars, musicians, and the like.
The fact is, you can pick virtually any field that involves the trade of products, skills, and services and go on to make a name for yourself.
Since there is no shortage of avenues by the way through which success can be achieved, the area of specialization is not as significant. At least not at the start. What matters are the core ingredients?
Starting with mindset.
As we have extolled throughout our previous writings, mindset is key. In fact, it can be argued that mindset is the key.
Your thoughts, beliefs about the self, beliefs about the world, and how they align with your goals and aims are central to the success equation.
Think about it: What really separates success stories from failures? Leaving aside those who turn out to be terribly unlucky. It is the determination to do well. To do well at something.
And to keep doing it, until you excel at it. And often the difference between those not only those who succeed but those who are able to reach a level of stability in life vs though who fall away into the abyss is also a question of grit and determination.
But as things stand today not many people (men in particular) are willing to rise up to the challenge of life and take it head-on. Are you going to be that person!?
Returning to the earlier point about talent and those who are blessed with natural ability. The fact of life is these elements, whilst significant, actually count for less.
One would not say it counts for nothing, cuz let’s face it, not everyone has the height, strength, and aim of a Michael Jordan. But the point remains that hard work built on serious dedication towards improving in a certain area is absolutely essential for success in life.
And success, in case you didn’t know isn’t as simple as you think. It is a long journey, filled with ups and downs, defeats and victories. And guess what not many are willing to face up to it.
Think here of the words of the American novelist Erica Jong ‘Everyone has talent. What’s rare is the courage to follow it to the dark places where it leads'.
You see, success can become a double-edged sword.
Whilst the rewards of becoming a success tend to get all the attention, what is often overlooked is effort, the sacrifices, and yes even the pain, mental and physical that you have to undergo in order to get there.
For example, talk to any guy who has six-pack abs. Do you think he got it overnight, or that it came as a result of spending a few hours at the gym once a week and eating whatever the heck he wanted?
The answer is clearly NO. The guy clearly put in the effort. He committed himself to a goal and worked to reach it.
The same principle applies to all other areas of life. Focus, dedication, hard work, and the determination to excel at something.
To use an analogy, it is a bit like studying computer programming: Where a broad understanding of various programming languages will help, but a deep and proficient knowledge of one is necessary. As it becomes the foundation for what you do professionally.
But getting there is only the start.
The pathway to success is fundamentally about getting the basics right. And then to do it consistently, whilst focusing on a higher goal or mission.
Finding your Purpose
What is the one thing in life that you cannot do without? Or better what is the one thing in life that you cannot go through life without doing or being in some way involved in?
Think deeply about this question.
For once you have the answer, the response will tie with everything else you intended to do with your life.
The questions of success, which we have broken down into four areas:
Health and Fitness
Social Life (Relationships with Women)
Whilst ‘Mindset’ comes in at No. 4. It is in many ways it is the foundational factor. One that you need to get right. But one that you must keep working on.
As the hurdles of life that you will face are many, and they never stop coming. But is there a way to navigate this arena?
For you may be wondering, especially if you are a later starter: Is there a way to make this path towards success, no matter your area of expertise, simpler?
What if there is? What if there is a proven method to make things right: to set your path from wherever you are today, towards the state where you getting closer and closer to your goals?
There is one. And that’s what we have to offer. We have the skills, the system, and the leadership to guide you toward your destination.
The one thing we expect from you is application and hard work. The rest will follow.
And keep in mind it is not about how good you think you are, what matters is what you are able to bring to the table. As the famous author, Stephen King said: ‘Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work.
Success is a key aspect of life. It is what everyone (or almost everyone) wants to have. The question is do they know how to get it? Do they know the core steps that take a person from a literal 0 to 100?
The answer to this question is expertise. Does the person with the answer to the ‘success question’ know what it takes? Have they been there and done that? Do they have the program to make it happen? And importantly are they willing to work with the person, in person to make it real? If you have found that person or outlet, then you are on the right track.
But remember success starts small. It is about succeeding at little things. And then being able to go to conquer greater ones.